How To Deal With Sister In Law Jealousy?
Marvin Harvey
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1. Don’t take her behavior personally – Having her attack you or be jealous of you can easily hurt your feelings. It’s perfectly normal to feel rejected or feel like you’re doing something wrong. However, one of the best ways to deal with the situation is to remember that it has more to do with her than it does with you.
Is it possible for a sister in law to be jealous?
How to Deal with a Jealous Sister-in-Law or Mother-in-Law
- She may be rude to you directly, but play nice in front of others. She also may appear happy or unbothered if you run into any problems or obstacles. She could get really judgmental, or try to make you look bad in front of other family members. People respond to jealousy in a variety of different ways, so it’s hard to know if she’s jealous or if there’s something else going on.
- If you haven’t talked to your sister in law, that may be a good first step. It’s possible she isn’t even jealous, or she has no idea that she’s being rude to you.
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- Your best option may be to kill her with kindness. If everyone sees you being really nice to your sister in law while she’s being snooty and rude, they may eventually correct her. She’s also more likely to just let it go if she can’t get a response out of you. Your other option is to enlist the help of your partner. If their sister is acting like a jerk, they should be willing to stand up for you and correct their sibling.
- Don’t let your sister in law cross any serious lines. If she violates a boundary or says something demeaning about you in front of others, stand up for yourself.
- This probably has more to do with them than you, so try not to worry about it. Your brother in law’s wife is far enough removed from your relationship with your partner that they shouldn’t have that much energy invested in you unless they’ve got some personal issues they’re dealing with. Either make an effort to get to know her better so the two of you can start getting along, or leave her alone and let her get over her issues on her own time.
- Try to be a little self-reflective about how you’ve behaved as well. If you’re putting out cold vibes, or you’re being a little hypercritical of your brother in law’s wife, they may simply be playing off of your energy.
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- Talk to your sibling about this, since they’re in the middle here. Your sibling cares about you and their wife, so it’s in their best interest to help put this problem to rest. Don’t force them to pick a side or anything, but see if they can help you get to the root of the issue. If their wife is seriously crossing a line at family gatherings or they’re violating important boundaries, stand up to them. A zero-tolerance policy towards abuse from your sibling’s wife should put an end to any jealous outbursts.
- Realistically, a lot of this going to fall on your sibling. They should be standing up for you if their wife is acting out, and they should be correcting you if you’re being unfair.
- Think about things from her point of view. She dedicated her life to raising a child and then you just come in out of nowhere and sweep them away from her! Yes, it’s a ridiculous thought, but that could be how it feels to her. It’s also possible that your mother in law sees how happy you and her child are, and now she’s feeling insecure about the way her relationships worked out. She may also be scared she isn’t going to see her child nearly as often as she used to.
- It could also be that your mother in law feels like they’re losing their child to someone they don’t know. If this is the case, she may relax over time as she gets to know you better.
- Try to be kind of empathetic with your mother in law. Your partner’s relationship with their mother is likely important to them, and if you don’t get along with her, it may put some strain on your partner.
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- Tread carefully and try to not stoop to her level. Some of this may get better over time as your mother in law warms up to you, but if it doesn’t, fighting with your partner’s mother may not put you on a road to success. You also can’t ignore your in laws, so this is where your ability to stay in control of your emotions is essential. Feel free to take breaks at family gatherings and just step outside for some fresh air, or hang out with a niece or uncle instead of your mother in law during holiday visits.
- Your partner’s relationship with their mother should partially guide how you deal with this. If they love their mother, you’re better off playing it cool and not engaging. If they aren’t the biggest fan of their mother, you may have more wiggle room when it comes to standing up to her.
- If your mother in law does cross a boundary, stand up for yourself. Just keep it as respectful as possible. If she openly puts you down for something, say, “I do not appreciate you talking to me like that.” Don’t engage or argue—just stop the conversation right there and move on.
- Because he is your mother in law, and she presumably going to be part of your life, it’s really important that you try and mend the relationship the best you can.
- Question What if my brother in-law’s wife has turned my other brother in-laws’ wives against me, too? If they are trying to push your buttons with indirect remarks, try to walk away with your head up. If they’re coming directly at you, ask them to change the conversation. If they continue, let them know the door of your house is wide open and leave.
- Question How can I build a better relationship with my brother-in-law’s wife? Bonding time is one of the best things to do. Show her your interests, ask about hers, and get to know each other more.
- Question After many years of taking care of my husbands parents, they are now living with his brother and wife. How do I stop my brother-in-law and his wife from taking all the credit? Just let it be. Your in-laws can decide who they want to live with, even if they get all the credit, don’t act jealous. Just subtly try to bond with your in-laws.
Ask a Question Advertisement Unless the problem is really out of hand, talking privately with the jealous person is always a safe, productive first step. Just ask them what’s going on and try to be vulnerable and honest with them. It’s possible they’re just going through something personal or you’ve accidentally done something to upset them.
Advertisement This article was co-authored by and by wikiHow staff writer,, Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist, Author, and TV/radio host based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli is currently in private practice and specializes in individual and couples’ relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more.
Kelli also facilitates groups for those struggling with alcohol and drug addiction as well as anger management groups. As an author, she received a Next Generation Indie Book Award for her book “Thriving with ADHD: A Workbook for Kids” and also wrote “Professor Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband”.
Elli was a host on LA Talk Radio, a relationship expert for The Examiner, and speaks globally. You can also see her work on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/kellibmiller, Instagram @kellimillertherapy, and her website: www.kellimillertherapy.com. She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.
This article has been viewed 164,442 times.
- Co-authors: 26
- Updated: November 3, 2021
- Views: 164,442
Categories:
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 164,442 times. : How to Deal with a Jealous Sister-in-Law or Mother-in-Law
How to deal with a difficult sister-in-law?
When Your Sister In Law Is Jealous
Thursday, February 28, 2013, 19:28 How much ever we deny, the fact remains that, your in-laws will still hold a prominent position in your spouse’s life. Similarly, this makes them a crucial part of your life as well. It becomes quite hectic to balance your needs with the needs of your new family.
- Though it could test the level of your patience, creating family harmony is possible and it’s very much worth the effort.
- As we all know dealing with in-laws can really difficult, somewhere you feel you can somehow deal with them.
- However, when it comes to dealing with your sister-in-law, it can be a trouble as there could be high levels of ego clashes and jealousy.
Meanwhile, a good rapport with the sister-in-law or anyone in the new family is always a boon. Though anyone might find it difficult in the initial stages of the marriage, but investing time will surely reap benefits and will be possible to deal with them positively. Here are some tips to deal and get along with your jealous sister-in-law: 1. Analyse maturely During the initial stages, it truly becomes difficult in understanding your new family. Here, you need to examine the situation closely and maturely. Misinterpretation and miscommunication is common.
- However, make sure you settle the misunderstanding before the relationship between you and your sister-in-law goes sour.2.
- Deal with the conflict Look from where the conflict is arising from, so that it will be easy to deal with the situation.
- Though it is a clear sign o jealousy, try and clear the air of discomfort between you and your sister-in-law.3.
Demonstrate care and compassion Demonstrate care and compassion towards your sister-in-law. Meaning, get her gifts and take her out for shopping and make her feel special. This could somewhere make her feel comfortable with you.4. Involve your spouse If you fail to deal with the issue, get your husband involved in the matter between you and your sister-in-law.
- Involving your spouse might help in resolving the problem.5.
- Speak out Inspite of the effort you are putting to make your sister-in-law understand you, there are few who do not budge to any requests.
- At this point, instead of holding the problem within you, speak out to your jealous sister-in-law directly and ask what is making her feel insecure about you.
There are some tips to deal with your jealous sister-in-law. Though you might hesitate to get involved in the matters related between you and your sister-in-law, do not forget that she is a part of your spouse family and have to deal with the impending issues in order to lead life in harmony.
How do you know if your sister in law is manipulative?
4. Your manipulative sister-in-law constantly insults or badmouths you. – The moment your sister-in-law insults you or ever referred to your family during an insult, such sister-in-law is jealous of you and can bad mouth you anywhere to feel good. She can make you look bad in front of everyone you love or tell them lies about you whenever you are absent.
Be careful of manipulative or jealous sister in law that act nice in your presence but pretend whenever you are not around, she only pretend to like you but can’t defend your honor anywhere, and this is a sign that your sister in law is jealous of you and would not appreciate your presence in that house.
You can be sure she is jealous of you when she indirectly insults your family, badmouths you in front of her family and friends, complains a lot about you.
How do you deal with a jealous mother in law?
How to Deal with a Jealous Sister-in-Law or Mother-in-Law
- She may be rude to you directly, but play nice in front of others. She also may appear happy or unbothered if you run into any problems or obstacles. She could get really judgmental, or try to make you look bad in front of other family members. People respond to jealousy in a variety of different ways, so it’s hard to know if she’s jealous or if there’s something else going on.
- If you haven’t talked to your sister in law, that may be a good first step. It’s possible she isn’t even jealous, or she has no idea that she’s being rude to you.
Advertisement
- Your best option may be to kill her with kindness. If everyone sees you being really nice to your sister in law while she’s being snooty and rude, they may eventually correct her. She’s also more likely to just let it go if she can’t get a response out of you. Your other option is to enlist the help of your partner. If their sister is acting like a jerk, they should be willing to stand up for you and correct their sibling.
- Don’t let your sister in law cross any serious lines. If she violates a boundary or says something demeaning about you in front of others, stand up for yourself.
- This probably has more to do with them than you, so try not to worry about it. Your brother in law’s wife is far enough removed from your relationship with your partner that they shouldn’t have that much energy invested in you unless they’ve got some personal issues they’re dealing with. Either make an effort to get to know her better so the two of you can start getting along, or leave her alone and let her get over her issues on her own time.
- Try to be a little self-reflective about how you’ve behaved as well. If you’re putting out cold vibes, or you’re being a little hypercritical of your brother in law’s wife, they may simply be playing off of your energy.
Advertisement
- Talk to your sibling about this, since they’re in the middle here. Your sibling cares about you and their wife, so it’s in their best interest to help put this problem to rest. Don’t force them to pick a side or anything, but see if they can help you get to the root of the issue. If their wife is seriously crossing a line at family gatherings or they’re violating important boundaries, stand up to them. A zero-tolerance policy towards abuse from your sibling’s wife should put an end to any jealous outbursts.
- Realistically, a lot of this going to fall on your sibling. They should be standing up for you if their wife is acting out, and they should be correcting you if you’re being unfair.
- Think about things from her point of view. She dedicated her life to raising a child and then you just come in out of nowhere and sweep them away from her! Yes, it’s a ridiculous thought, but that could be how it feels to her. It’s also possible that your mother in law sees how happy you and her child are, and now she’s feeling insecure about the way her relationships worked out. She may also be scared she isn’t going to see her child nearly as often as she used to.
- It could also be that your mother in law feels like they’re losing their child to someone they don’t know. If this is the case, she may relax over time as she gets to know you better.
- Try to be kind of empathetic with your mother in law. Your partner’s relationship with their mother is likely important to them, and if you don’t get along with her, it may put some strain on your partner.
Advertisement
- Tread carefully and try to not stoop to her level. Some of this may get better over time as your mother in law warms up to you, but if it doesn’t, fighting with your partner’s mother may not put you on a road to success. You also can’t ignore your in laws, so this is where your ability to stay in control of your emotions is essential. Feel free to take breaks at family gatherings and just step outside for some fresh air, or hang out with a niece or uncle instead of your mother in law during holiday visits.
- Your partner’s relationship with their mother should partially guide how you deal with this. If they love their mother, you’re better off playing it cool and not engaging. If they aren’t the biggest fan of their mother, you may have more wiggle room when it comes to standing up to her.
- If your mother in law does cross a boundary, stand up for yourself. Just keep it as respectful as possible. If she openly puts you down for something, say, “I do not appreciate you talking to me like that.” Don’t engage or argue—just stop the conversation right there and move on.
- Because he is your mother in law, and she presumably going to be part of your life, it’s really important that you try and mend the relationship the best you can.
- Question What if my brother in-law’s wife has turned my other brother in-laws’ wives against me, too? If they are trying to push your buttons with indirect remarks, try to walk away with your head up. If they’re coming directly at you, ask them to change the conversation. If they continue, let them know the door of your house is wide open and leave.
- Question How can I build a better relationship with my brother-in-law’s wife? Bonding time is one of the best things to do. Show her your interests, ask about hers, and get to know each other more.
- Question After many years of taking care of my husbands parents, they are now living with his brother and wife. How do I stop my brother-in-law and his wife from taking all the credit? Just let it be. Your in-laws can decide who they want to live with, even if they get all the credit, don’t act jealous. Just subtly try to bond with your in-laws.
Ask a Question Advertisement Unless the problem is really out of hand, talking privately with the jealous person is always a safe, productive first step. Just ask them what’s going on and try to be vulnerable and honest with them. It’s possible they’re just going through something personal or you’ve accidentally done something to upset them.
Advertisement This article was co-authored by and by wikiHow staff writer,, Kelli Miller is a Psychotherapist, Author, and TV/radio host based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli is currently in private practice and specializes in individual and couples’ relationships, depression, anxiety, sexuality, communication, parenting, and more.
Kelli also facilitates groups for those struggling with alcohol and drug addiction as well as anger management groups. As an author, she received a Next Generation Indie Book Award for her book “Thriving with ADHD: A Workbook for Kids” and also wrote “Professor Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband”.
- Elli was a host on LA Talk Radio, a relationship expert for The Examiner, and speaks globally.
- You can also see her work on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/kellibmiller, Instagram @kellimillertherapy, and her website: www.kellimillertherapy.com.
- She received her MSW (Masters of Social Work) from the University of Pennsylvania and a BA in Sociology/Health from the University of Florida.
This article has been viewed 164,442 times.
- Co-authors: 26
- Updated: November 3, 2021
- Views: 164,442
Categories:
Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 164,442 times. : How to Deal with a Jealous Sister-in-Law or Mother-in-Law